Why Does Nobody Want to Piss Next to Me?

Confidence Boost

This has been on my mind for a few days now.

During the course of my day I will consume X number of beverages (water, soda) and the result is impending urination. I take my hop, skip and jump to the little boy's room to relieve my tank but gander at the urinals to notice guys do not piss next to each other. If there is an open space between two guys, the next peeer in line will go into the stalls.

Why?

Yes at sporting events where 57% of the crowd is drunk and you have a 4-8 minute window between quarters to piss, men will pull out their instruments and piss in tight quarters, but in office settings this never happens.

Comfort might be one reason why guys never piss next to each other. Little more elbow room to work with. Another reason is that guys are always concerned with other guys staring at their junk. Men don't want to be perceived as meat gazers nor does a guy want to accidentally turn around, see another cock and then have to think about it, ie "he's bigger than me/he doesn't shave/that's a weird curve." I also feel the awkwardness is a factor. You're there holding your manhood when somebody else turns around and says "D-Wade had a hell of a game last night." Urinals are too intimate to have casual conversation.

When possible, a man will run to open space and piss the pee away.

If, and only if, there are no other spots open will a man shimmy his way between two other men and pee and almost instantly stare forward or down and not turn his head even a centimeter and pray the piss is short.

From this point forward I am making it a goal to piss next to guys in the bathroom and strike up a conversation. There is no need for men to become balls of insecurity when urination time approaches.